There are three types of people i don't like, tight people, racists, and the Swiss. Swiss people, by virtue of being all three of these things, are at a distinct disadvantage in my book. Similarly, Israelis, most Americans and bar staff who are incapable of taking more than one drink order at a time are also all three of the above listed, and won't be getting any invites to my wedding. Weddings, i have discovered, are no longer big extravagant excuses for the mother of all hoolies, rather they are an excuse for 6-9 months of therapy (with a possible nervous breakdown or three) and a unique way to piss everybody off, whether the feckin thing goes ahead or not.
The end of Mexico was cool, spent a couple of days on a beach pretending to get a tan - pasty is the new tan, i am assured - before a night in Cancun. Cancun is really 2 towns, one 30km strip of resorts and hotels and drunk Merkins, and one small normal-ish mexican town with cheap beer and cheaper cigars. Not as cheap as Cozumel, which provided the celebratory - illegal when smoked - cubans for the menfolk after the not wedding.
Florida was Merkin. I should restrain myself from publishing too many details as who knows who will be reading this (Hello!, Vogue etc.). Full details over pints in Melbourne before, during and after Mayo beat Galway in the semi-final.
Now in Panama, and after a couple of days in Panama city, where my mother had fun, if generally panicked, eyes-closed-in-traffic fun. The place is great, went to the miraflores locks, but didn't see any ships go through. Spent a day diving in the north, saw a 70 drug-running plane which had crashed. Very very cool. Deb has decided bugger coral, she is goingto only dive wrecks from now on. Have now gone north/west to David, and will spend the next week in this province eating lobster i have to catch with my bare teeth, and baiting Merkins by speaking too quickly and using big words. They all think i am from Holland when i say "Ireland", which given my gangly frame, blond hair, dutch accent and sanctimonious nature is an easy mistake to make.
I'll stop now before i run out of people to insult. Will post some photos in the next few days.
This concludes the voting of the Central American jury. Tog go bog e.
c